Happy 7th Birthday, Son.
The night you were born was beautiful. Your birth mother wailed in agony of labor pains, while I laid in my bed wallowing in my own kind of labor pains. There was beauty in both of these moments. One was painted with strokes of joy, while the other, strokes of despair; and yet, both were beautiful. I did not know that my tearful prayer that night collided with the birth of you.
Two days later, we were asked to take you in. Two days later, I held you for the first time. I cannot think of anything more amazing than that.
Love knows no boundaries, no genetic markers, no birthing, and no blood lines. Love takes hold of opportunities and transforms them into beauty.
Before there was you, it was just me and my infertility. Before you, my heart was only half-developed. Before there was you, I only knew one layer of love.
Love grabbed a hold of me the first time I saw you…instantly.
In an instant, I was separated from infertility for the first time in more years than I can remember. For the first time, I felt whole. For the first time, I also felt complete fear. I feared loving and losing you.
I wished I would have been there the day you were born. I wished I could have heard your first cry, held you while you welcomed Earthly air into your lungs, and whispered loving words to both you and your birth mother. I would have been there had I known your circumstances. I would have stood by your birth mother as she was told she would leave the hospital without you. I would have done this because I honor her, and I love you.
I prayed for you the entire time we were fostering you. I petitioned the Lord on your behalf, and on your birth mother’s. How could I love you, and not want your birth mother to experience the same kind of love? How could I look at myself in the mirror everyday knowing that I had been gifted with you, and not for one moment, want the best for her? How could I allow love to overfill my heart, and not have any leftover for her?
Happy 7th Birthday, Son. Love took a hold of me the moment I saw you.
Love still takes hold of us. It tempers us in our moments of frustration. It claims us in our times of messes. It wraps around us in our seasons of sadness. Love holds us together in our moments of hardship, and it leaps with us in our times of joy.
Love seizes my heart time and again when thinking of you. I happen to believe you are one of the most endearing, unique, and important little boys that has ever existed. You are wonderfully ambitious, loving, spirited, and an incredible child of God. Please don’t forget how beautiful, and deeply loved you are.
I don’t consider these past seven years to be lucky ones. They are much more than that. I consider them to be ones that have proven that nothing compares to the capacity that love has to intervene in our lives.
Happy 7th Birthday, Son. You’ve given us seven amazingly beautiful years.
Love knows no boundaries. It does not comprehend genetic markers. It has no birthing or blood lines necessary.
Love truly takes hold of opportunities and transforms them into beauty.
Love changes lives.
5 thoughts on “Love Changes Lives (Happy Birthday, Son)”
Wow Caroline! Great blog and very well put. I only wish every birth parent who is unable to parent their own child could read this!
I was just crying and rejoicing with you. Thank you for sharing so beautifully. I have cried those same tears! Thankfully blessed with 3 daughters now, but the remembrance is there. Happy Days to you and yours!
Praise God! Just awesome.
so sweet! Happy birthday to your son!